Monday, September 7, 2015


 When I shut my eyes last night I saw a flurry of snowflakes flying about with the still green leaves and grass.  It was such a shock that I quickly opened my eyes to reassure myself with reality. Yes, the grass was still green and the trees have mostly green leaves but I believe an early winter is sending hints telepathically.

We have been here in Taos the entire summer. It’s been a beautiful summer but I must admit that sometimes I feel claustrophobic here. Of course, there is lots of physical space and the sky is huge, but the emotional space can sometimes close in like an inward swirling spiral. When that happens, I take a deep breath and write. It connects me to the larger world more effectively than the evening news.
Spider Rock Road on the Rez two weeks ago.

The Spanish came here looking for the Cities of Gold. They went through all of the pueblos in their search and each one pointed them north to the next and said, “It isn't here but you will probably find it up north.” Taos was at the end of the list. People still come here looking for paradise. When the Spanish came, they had to give up on the gold and settle for land and exploitation of the natives. However, there is gold here. What the Spanish and later the art community didn't take into account is that this kind of Gold is Alchemical Gold and you have to go through the whole alchemical transformation to earn it.

Locals sardonically refer to our Land of Enchantment as the Land of Entrapment. Like the Hotel California of Eagles fame, “you can check out, but you can never, never leave.” Unless you are wealthy enough to make Taos a vacation home, you may experience it as a patch of quicksand. You have to stay cool or you will surely sink. We have two houses here but we can't sell either one. We are committed to taking care of them probably for life. That is OK. I don't want to leave permanently; I just want the option of being somewhere else for relief and perspective, preferably Cottonwood Arizona. It always feels good to view life from a softer environment now and then. If we could afford it, it would be nice to travel out of the country now and then.

Being born here means that the Pueblo will always own PQ. That is both wonderful and challenging. As a Gemini, (at least I have a concept to describe my situation) it is normal for me to belong in several places at once.  I am connected to the soil of several geographical areas and possibly more than one dimension. I'm an alternative person and I don't flaunt it, but the world of working several low paying jobs just to survive has always seemed like life in a prison chain gang. However, I know it is my own fault for not believing in me. Bare survival is hell and I'm tired of it. Finally, I can say it without twinging with conditioned guilt. Now that I'm officially old, I don't want to waste any more time on hoping to get out of a hopeless loop. I want to paint, write and work with PQ to interact with the many people we meet who wish to drink from the well of sacred art and earth wisdom his culture and family tradition represents.

This place that reeks of the past is also a crucible for the future. This is the primary reason I'm so interested in Mark Gordon’s production of the video about Mabel Dodge Lujan, her Taos Pueblo husband Tony and her attempt to draw to Taos visionary people she termed “movers and shakers” of   culture. No one else has really bothered to look at the alchemical mix of Anglo and Spanish culture with the Native people of Taos Pueblo before Mabel or since. Not that she would have looked at it in just this way, but Mabel was quite aware and even uniquely aware for her time of the Earth Magic lost to her own people and also how important it was to retrieve this lost connection as well as honoring its preservation by the Taos Indians.

I was watering the garden a few days ago when a light went on and I realized that the story of the sinking of Atlantis was a projection into the past of a future toward which our society is heading. I'm not saying that Atlantis it is a product only of fantasy, but fantasy is somewhat like a dream, it contains meanings hidden from ego consciousness. Personally, I believe Atlantis is real anytime a society prides itself too highly for technology and intellect and loses hold of its life source. Scientists are now the priestly class, as they were in Atlantis.

Other sentient beings can remind us of what we are and what we share if we try to know them. Animal cruelty is rampant in our modern world. It is the cruelty of psychopathy, that is, lack of emotional feeling connection. We process our food animals as if they were pieces of paper or wood.  In the world economy, money is blood. We might as well see ourselves like the mink and fox trapped for their fur. We have also become a commodity. Everything is about money, yet does money have a meaning of its own? After the heart is numbed, money is the only value left and when there is no concept of love, only power over others is left. It's interesting that astrologically, Venus is the archetype of both love and material goods. I now see the connection. After love fails, there is only gold and diamonds, and there are never enough of these. The story of Atlantis is our fate if we don’t find our hearts.


  1. Well, Marti...
    You are in quite the doom-and-gloom mode these days. Very powerful words. You are absolutely right, though - kind of scary if you let it get to you, isn't it? Sounds like you need a Cottonwood Fix! Much Love...

    1. Deborah, I always appreciate your comments. Besides, its a way of staying in touch. The love is mutual.